The Bathtub Book Club: Farmer Fantasies and Surfer Delusions
A unofficial analysis of reading patterns and a tub crawl
Back in 2013, I started keeping obsessive lists of all the books I read throughout the year. I’m not sure what inspired this move, but I’m glad for it. There have been distinct patterns in my reading life and the documented years of my “year in books” reveal these undeniable themes:
Farmer Fantasies
There are always farmer memoirs—memoirs from idyllic farms in Spain, Ireland, Africa. I’m not sure why farming sparks me as it does. I find it impossible to wake up before 10am, I have a wonky back that permits lifting nothing and I have an inability to fix anything but grammar (sometimes) and dinner (sometimes).
2. Surfer/Yachtie Delusions
I have no interest in surfing in real life, but I sure do love everything about it. The locales, the cool boards, shorts, flip flops, salt-stiff hair and open-top Jeeps. However, my preferred place is safely on the beach, not bobbing in the sea with things that can’t be seen below your neck. Mysteriously, I also love memoirs about ocean wayfarers who do transcontinental voyages with a dog or, make a beeline to Caribbean isles with some fishing line and star charts.
3. Everest Hallucinations
I’ll read everything and anything about Everest even though I begin to get goosebumps in August and they last for nine months of the year. My teeth begin to chatter around this time too.
4. Sommelier + Chef Phantasms
I no longer have interest in being a sommelier—where would I work? The Lion’s Head Pub? Do they even serve wine? Every year I find books about the somms and love the genesis stories and poetic descriptions—wines that taste like horse saddles and poured cement and cut grass and butterscotch pudding. In the same vein, I love reading cookbook-y memoirs even though there’s a very big chance that I won’t be inspired to recreate a single recipe.
Your homework: In Iceland, there is a beautiful Christmas Eve tradition that the whole world should get on (surf)board with already! During , jólabókaflóð, or the “Christmas Book Flood,” books are exchanged on December 24th and the rest of the evening is spent reading. Iceland’s 330,000 inhabitants read more books per capita than anywhere else in the world. Chew on this stat: one in ten Icelanders will publish a book in their lifetime! Reading has been dubbed a national sport in Iceland—it’s time for the rest of us to get off the bench and into the game.
Your beer: This is a very special edition of The Bathtub Book Club. Let’s do a “tub crawl.” Here are the 1st place finisher of all the pours I had this hazy IPA and coffee porter-soaked year: Great Lakes Brewing Coconut Coffee Porter.
The Books
In chronological order, here’s my year-long list of books (41!) and 41 one-word reviews.
Chop Suey Nation: The Legion Café and Other Stories from Canada’s Chinese Restaurants by Ann Hui
—“Savoury!”
Transit: A Novel by Rachel Cusk—“Introspective”
The Man Who Ate Everything by Jeffery Steingarten—“Stale”
Confetti at the Cornish Café by Phillipa Ashley—“Saccharin”
Highballer by Greg Nolan—“Pompous”
This Cake is for the Party by Sarah Selecky –“Luminous”
Where the Crawdads Sing by Delia Owens—“Remarkable”
Rising: Becoming the First North American Woman on Everest by Sharon Wood—“Influential”
The World of Laura Ingalls Wilder: The Frontier Landscapes that Inspired the Little House Books by Marta McDowell—“Joyful”
Birds and Beacons of Michigan by Kimberly and John Kotzian—“Erudite”
Nobody Cares by Anne T. Donahue —“SAUCY!”
The Natural World of Winne the Pooh: A walk through the forest that inspired the Hundred Acre Wood by Kathryn Aalto—“Whimsical”
In the Valleys of the Noble Beyond: In Search of the Sasquatch by John Zada—“Enchanting”
Greenwood by Michael Christie—“Disturbing”
The Dome Chronicles by Garry Leeson—“Ambitious”
I’m Thinking of Ending Things by Iain Reid—“Perplexing”
The Life and Destiny of Isak Dinesen by Frans Lasson and Clara Svendsen—“Triumphant”
The History of Love by Nicole Krauss—“Complicated”
The Imperfectionists by Tom Rochman—“Intelligent”
The Alice B. Toklas Cookbook–“Indulgence”
Dead Mom Walking by Rachel Matlow—“Necessary”
Feasting Wild: In Search of the Last Untamed Food by Gina Rae La Cerva—“Enlightening”
The Inner Life of Animals: Love, Grief, Compassion—Surprising Observations of a Hidden World by Peter Wohlleben—“Evocative”
Field Notes from an Unintentional Birder: A Memoir by Julia Zarankin—“Uplifting”
Red, White and Drunk All Over: A Wine-Soaked Journey from Grape to Glass by Natalie MacLean— “Bottomless”
My Grandmother Sends her Regards and Apologises by Fredrik Backman– “MARVELOUS!”
Just Checking: Scenes from the Life of an Obsessive Compulsive by Emily Colas—“Peculiar”
County Heirlooms: Recipes and Reflections from Prince Edward County by Natalie Wollenberg and Leigh Nash—“Galvanizing”
Starting Out in the Afternoon: A Mid-Life Journey into Wild Land by Jill Frayne—“Meditative”
The Shark and the Albatross: A Wildlife Filmmaker Reveals Why Nature Matters to Us All by John Aitchison—“Wondrous”
Blaze Island by Catherine Bush—“Ominous”
When We Were Vikings by Andrew David MacDonald—“FIERCE!”
Wine Girl: The Trials and Triumphs of America’s Youngest Sommelier by Victoria James — “Disappointing”
The New Farm: Our Ten Years on the Front Lines of the Good Food Revolution by Brent Preston – “Impelling”
If I Knew Then: Finding Wisdom in Failure and Power in Aging by Jann Arden— “Gospel”
Educated by Tara Westover–“STARTLING!”
The Kinfolk Garden: How to Live with Nature by John Burns–“OM”
I Dreamed of Africa by Kuki Gallmann—“TRANSCENDENT!”
The Earth Almanac: A Year of Witnessing the Wild from the Call of the Loon to the Journey of the Gray Whale by Ted Williams—“Purity”
Indians on Vacation by Thomas King—“Uninhibited”
The Snow Leopard by Peter Matthiessen—“Mesmerizing”
These one word book reviews made me laugh plus very utterly? succinct! Bravo!